pause

You may have noticed this blog is paused.
I am living in Moldova, and you can follow the journey at
www.thecabbagediaries.wordpress.com.

From there, you can subscribe to the blog (I think the button is "follow") to receive the new posts in your email.

Please forgive me for not updating this blog for awhile, for some odd reason I'd rather sing hymns with the orphans until 1 a.m under the summer stars than sit at the computer.  Weird, I know.

Lauren and Dana, please email me your phone numbers.

I hope everyone is doing so good, I love and miss you.

Good reads

Lately, now that I have pretty much zero time, I have been devouring books.  Makes sense.
Not fiction.
Child phsycology for dealing with foster and orphan children, sexually abused, abandoned, etc.
True stories about abandoned children.

I submit to you two books that you must read.  I purchased them used, very inexpensive, from www.betterworldbooks.com


Odyssey of a Romanian Street Child

You MUST read this book. A true-to-life picture of the reality the street children produced by communism face. This book follows a young man who meets a Christian who changed his life forever with simple compassion.




The Boy from Baby House 10

This book involves a Christian young woman as well.  You wouldn't know it right away, because she doesn't belong to "our" denomination.  But she is definitely a saved Christian.  She just doesn't know anything about denominations.  She instinctively knew she should be giving back after she met Christ, and that is how she met this little boy... abandoned and set aside as retarded in the orphanage and asylum system, his only crime was to be born with a problem with his legs.  His story is incredible, and his level of intelligence at a young age was astonishing.  This book is not written from a Christian perspective at all, but it is truly reality.

That's where I'm at.  I earnestly desire to understand the reality my kids live in.

relating

Life's pretty sweet.  Especially when you open up and learn to relate with people.


Little Turkey and his cousin finally met a few weeks ago.  Boys will be boys and I love it!



Squeakers was pretty sweet today at Bannack Days.  She was quite a trooper considering she was covered with spots by the end of the day.  We're thinking maybe Chicken Pox?  This is one of my favorite pictures of her yet, taken with my new camera today.

Yesterday, I met this very intelligent woman who happens to be on my block.  People have been telling us for months that we need to meet her, and apparently they've been telling her the same about us.  She and her husband adopted a Russian orphan girl about 5 years ago, and they are returning to Russia in a few weeks where she will be teaching for a period of time at a University.  She is a Christian and we spoke in length about the emotional needs of the orphans in Eastern Europe.  This wonderful woman armed me with a pile of books and some tearful advice.  I thank God so much for our meeting.  I plan to meet with her again soon.  She is writing a book and has the burden to tell the story of Russian orphans, just as I do for the Moldovan orphans.  We both grew up on ranches.  Its uncanny.

Having begun reading my pile of books, I am very stirred up about purposeful parenting, and have such a desire for the Lord to give us wisdom.  The needs of these girls are deep and complex.  This morning on the way to church, I was talking to God and telling Him, "If ONLY money were no issue.  We could truly be limitless and without distractions."  Then I realized who I was talking to, and Duh!  Money is no issue for Him.  Its ALL His.  He owns the cattle on a thousand hills, the wealth in every mine.  So I laughed and said "Okay God.  Sorry I lapsed into worry for a sec.  You've got this."  Well, over the next two hours this morning in church, 5 different people came up and handed me money.  I wanted to laugh and cry.  They were paying me for odd jobs, photography jobs, jobs I'd forgotten about, and just plain being generous.

Last week I bit the bullet and purchased a new camera.  I have debated for months what to do about equipment in Moldova.  I desperately needed something to capture video AND sound if I am going to tell God's story of Moldova.  After much deliberation, not wanting to take a camera AND a video camera, I finally stumbled upon the Canon T4i.  Its 3 upgrades from my previous model, but it is highly geared towards video capture.  It has TWO built in mics, plus an external mic input.  For a few minutes I anguished over the seeming foolishness of investing several hundred dollars into this equipment right before launching into the chapter of life where I have no income and plenty of expenses.  But, then I realized that I have never ever regretted purchasing any of the big things in the past.  God has used all of them greatly for His glory.  Today at church, God gave me every cent back that I spent on that equipment, and then some... in a matter of 20 minutes.  The new equipment: Canon Rebel T4i, Rode external shotgun mic, 40 mm Canon STM lens (this is  a special quiet lens for video so the mics won't pic up the noise from focusing)

Oh yeah.  And if that weren't all enough, we got a call saying we will very likely be getting an offer on the house tomorrow.

Isn't He so good?!  "Trust me."  He seems to say that to me in so many ways every day.

Thank you everyone for your prayers.  We are very aware of them.

Mr. & Mrs.

Another beautiful wedding.
Mom was at a different wedding this weekend, so I had Brittany as my second shooter.  I haven't looked at her photos yet, but what I saw on her camera was looking fantastic.

I haven't started the wedding edit process yet, but I couldn't resist posting this picture from my folder.
Congrats, AJ and Leah!

It's a date!

Well folks, I have a date.  August 6th I fly out.  I purchased my very first one-way ticket the other day!


(This post was originally much longer and newsier, however I lost it all)

a day in the life of

I've been working on wedding photos all day. This is how a wedding-edit day goes... Shut out the world, play sappy happy music on repeat, edit edit edit, stop to paint your nails, "FOCUS ANNA!", edit edit edit, notice a gopher outside your window and stop to watch him... thinking to yourself "he's actually cute, aww" (this is ONLY due to the mushy gushy mindset of editing wedding photos), "FOCUS ANNA!", edit, find knitting - pick it up - knit a row, contemplate love, "FOCUS ANNA!", edit, break at McDonalds to get the wifi hookup to write about your ADD tendancies. :-)

I love...

... lemonade stands.  I cannot resist little entreprenuers.

<3

Unless they want to watch me drink it, I usually pour it out later.  Today's lemonade def. had floaters. It was so stinkin' cute.  I drove by this little girl about 4 times today running various errands.  Finally I stopped.  Actually, I drove totally out of my way to go back to her stand.

Upon arrival, I was given the options of cherry, pink, strawberry or regular.  I chose regular.  She assertively handed me her sign and told me to hold it up where people would see it while she poured my lemonade.  I complied.

I gave her 30 cents and told her to keep the change.  She was starry-eyed.

Have a nice day. :-)

The Cabbage Diaries

Kristy and I have started a new blog, The Cabbage Diaries.  This is a very public journal where people from our community and life can follow along on our Moldova journey.

www.thecabbagediaries.wordpress.com
As you can see, I'm giving wordpress a try.

I plan to use my blog still for more personal purposes.  Things are going well, I still don't have an exact departure date yet as the real estate process is still in progress.

Please continue to pray for Kristy's house to sell, and for the missionaries as they are raising support for this ministry.

Prayer request

Hello all 5 of you.

I ask that you please pray that God will help the AOH get the Hannah House purchased.  Today is really important, the purchase is almost complete and that old serpent is trying to stop the real estate transaction.

My departure, and the Hannah House, is on hold until they have the house in possession.

To know my purpose

I sit here, at someone else's kitchen table, weeping.  I am housesitting and I always seem to find the Lord a little closer when I'm here.  Life is slightly put on hold, just me and the 3 dogs.  It is snowing outside, my cup of coffee sits beside me.

As I prepare to move to Moldova, I struggle to know the big picture.  What is His purpose for me?  To love the girls, yes.  To train the missionaries to be able to use their printing press, yes.  To give of myself, yes.

But... still, I struggle to know the BIG picture.  As I've researched trafficking, my heart has swelled with the horror these girls face, and the NEED my soul has to tell their story.  I know that is a big part of God's purpose in getting me involved.  In giving me a job I never sought, working at a newspaper for 7 years, being PAID to learn graphic design.  His purpose in giving me a role much bigger than myself as an 18 year old, leading teenagers across the state as part of the 5-person state 4-H Officer team... my title - Montana State 4-H Publicity Officer.  Both were a part of my life, a part of His plan, before I was even saved.

This morning, I found this video on a Montana Photographers Group.  And that is why I sit here weeping.  This is it.  My purpose.  To advocate for a cure for cancer?  No.  To tell the story of Moldova.  Beautifully.  Simply.  The style of the first 2 minutes of this video is powerful.

This morning, I prayed with arms outstretched that the Lord would take the talents He gave me, and use every last drop of them for His purpose.  I prayed that He would guide my hands and my thoughts to create the story that will touch people's hearts to pray for Moldova; to give financially to the work that the Lord is doing there to bring Christ to these who have no other hope in this world.

Project M: Bee, my Buddy

Love, love {LOVE!} laying in the grass for macro shots! I am so glad to finally be forcing myself to shoot manual.

50 mm lens, Manual
Left: f/2.2, ISO 400, 1/2000 sec.
Right: f/4, ISO 200, 1/1250 sec.
(in the large file, you can see an ant right in front of the bee's face.  Awesome!)

I believe that God and I have the same delight for tiny details. Its all important and beautiful.

I recently purchased 2 exteeeeeensive sets of Florabella actions, to help speed up my post production workflow.  I can tell already that they were an excellent investment, and there's a very large online community of Florabella users who share their different uses of the actions. Classic Film below, 10 seconds max.

Sponges

I teach Sunday School to 2 & 3 year olds.
I teach AWANA to Cubbies, 3-4-5 year olds.

Occasionally I wonder if it makes any difference.  Are they picking anything up at all?
I adore these little sweet peas, but is God accomplishing anything more through me than simply corraling them for an hour or two?  We tell them about Jesus and God, but do they remember?

Yes.  They do.

I met the big sister of one of my "non-church" Cubbies the other night.  She's a bit of a rebel teen, a.k.a. NORMAL.  I asked her if she was K's sister, and told her I taught him in Cubbies and that I just loved him.  She told me that yes, that is her little brother.  "He loves Cubbies.  Its his favorite thing.  He talks about it non-stop and is waiting for the summer break to be over."

"The other day, in the car, my mom said she was allergic to something.  K spoke up from the back seat and said.... I'm not allergic to anything!  And that's okay, because that is exactly how God made me."

Once, when she (big sister) was sick, K told his mom "She will get better.  I will pray for her."

Without Cubbies, K wouldn't know about prayer.  K wouldn't know that God created him EXACTLY as He wanted to.  K wouldn't know that God created him to need those adorable glasses.

I don't know how little K will grow up.  But, I do know that seeds have been planted, and God has given me the gift of being able to see that some have fallen on good ground.  May they take root and GROW! GROW! GROW!

It's the little things.

So, a story...
Yesterday, leaving work, I spotted some garbage on the dental clinic lawn. A still, small voice {a.k.a. God} said "Go pick that up Anna." Unlike what the rest of you would have done, I ignored it and got in my car... thinking only of getting home and eating a cookie.

I sat there for a moment and then sighed. "How hard is it to pick up a few pieces of garbage? Don't be so stinkin' lazy ANNA!" (Yes, I talk to myself like this. And you don't?)

Under one of those garbage pieces, I found a really dirty $10. HA! Isn't God awesome? :-) If I will only do what He asks me to, He will take care of me. He will even treat Kendra and I to a $9.85 adventure at Dairy Queen.

Project M: Lobsters (and stuff)

Little Turkey is spending the night.  Just 'cause.  He and I went for a photo walk tonight.
Actually, I'm the only one who was on a photo walk.  Little Turkey was hunting lions and bad guys.
At one point he said to me... "I'm so afraid of pictures Aunt Anna!  Please don't shoot me."  A little high on the drama there, Bud.

When you put a friendly Auntie together with a friendly Superman, you're bound to meet people.  We met these brothers on our walk.

I totally forgot about my white balance while shooting, I left it on flourescent lighting. I believe that's why there's such a blue hue.

Big Brother
Rim lighting, almost a silhouette
50mm lens, Manual

Meet Noah.  Crawdad expert, just ask him.
Noah exhuberantly demonstrated his prowess at finding crawdads.  I have to admit, he was good.
I even caught one.  Braxton wouldn't touch them.
50mm lens, Manual

Braxton insists that these were lobsters.
50mm lens, Manual

So, I'm starting to figure this manual stuff out.  There's really just 3 basic elements you have to control.

ISO, Shutter Speed and Aperture.  Decide what is most important to you in the shot.

Do you want to freeze action?  Set shutter speed first.

Do you want dreamy shallow DOF, or crystal clear for miles DOF?  Set Aperture first.  Lower number, wider open (more light), shallower depth of field.  Higher number, smaller opening (less light), sharper depth of field.

As I said, decide if depth of field or shutter speed is more important.  Set that first.  THEN go to your remaining two elements and adjust as necessary.  The name of the game is to zero out.  On your meter, you want that little line to be at zero.  Or just below, or just above, depending on your personal preference.  A good rule of thumb is that you can ALWAYS find detail in a photo that's under-exposed, but you can't bring back detail in an over-exposed shot.  The data just isn't there in the blown out areas.  When in doubt, underexpose.

If I want a shallow depth of field, I'll set my aperture to, oh, 3.5ish or lower.  Then, I need to adjust my shutter speed and ISO to compensate.  They say you can hand-hold at 1/30th, but not slower without camera shake.  If you have to go slower than 1/30th, you're in trouble.  Now you need to bring in that other tool, ISO.  ISO controls how sensitive your image sensor is to light.  My camera goes up to 3200, but the higher you go, the grainier your images.  I try to avoid going higher than 1600.  If there is a lot of available light, I usually stay around 400.

*Project M photos are shot in manual mode, displayed as SOOC (straight out of camera a.k.a. no retouch).

home is where the deodorant is...

:-)

What a whirlwind these days are.  Please pray for us.  My brain is so scrambled that I'm more absentminded than ever.  If I had a penny for every time I've forgotten to zip up my pants the last week I'd have a dime.  I lose my keys on a daily basis.  I've had to have Kristy come jumpstart me because I left my car lights on, again.  I locked my keys in my car at church, again.  I worry so much about forgetting deodorant that I found a stockpile of 3 full size containers in my travel bag.

I was housesitting for a week and a half.  Then I went straight to a Photo Class weekend in Billings, I could write a whole chapter about that.  I'm so excited, SO excited about photography.  Particularly journalistic style, as I have a burden to tell Moldova's story.  And Dana, I met another girl JUST like us.  We do need to work on our Project M, she would be so on board! :-)  This weekend I'll catch up.

Kristy leaves in 4 days for Moldova.  She will be there for 2 weeks this time.  She is going with a group of dentists from Oregon, and they will be doing dental work in the villages.  She's taking as much baggage as possible so she can leave things there for when she moves later.

We have so many things to get done.  So many.  Legal paperwork.  Media projects for the Hamiltons as they continue to raise support for the Hannah House.  Bank accounts for transferring money internationally.  Garage sale.  Dates with Superman.  One-on-One time with Squeakers.  Time with friends.  I want to hike.  I want to fish.  I want to SOAK IT UP.  This Montana, this United States of America.  This love I am surrounded with.  The smell of country.  Hugging my dad.  The baby calves.  The weathered old ranchers who I've known since I can remember, I want to memorize the lines in their leathery faces and the twinkle in their eyes.  The lines of the majestic mountains stretching out underneath our big blue sky.  Mentally recording my Mom's stinker giggle.  Spending time, spending time, spending time...

I'm learning as much as I can, trying to be a sponge.  Everything we can learn is something we can teach those orphans.  They NEED that.

The one thing I wish I could have learned before leaving is singing.  Oh I wish I knew more about 4 part harmony.  The girls (and the boys) would SO enjoy singing.  I just wish I knew more of the science behind parts.  I need to find someone to glean this knowledge from.

Eventually, I'll start a photojournal of this journey.  Thanks for praying!

The M ladies dressed all matchy-matchy in our home-sewn gingham finery.
Resurrection Sunday

Squeakers turned 1!

My first ever storage unit.
Weekend goal: 4 more boxes to storage!

The lost generation: Moldova

Thousands of orphans in Moldova are without Christ and without love.  Thousands of orphans in Moldova will continue to be trafficked if we do nothing.

For a little background info on how we are involved with the Hannah House, read this previous post.

HappinessCaptured just finished producing this video for the Hamiltons as a tool to raise support for The Hannah House.  Please be in prayer for God to send the support needed to purchase the right house in Moldova.  Feel free to share this video with people who may have an interest in supporting this ministry.

Moving

I am moving to Moldova in June. Kristy is coming later this year. The missionaries we visited in October are starting a home for teen orphan girls there, The Hannah House.

Moldova is home to approx. 12,000 orphans, most are abandoned by their parents who cannot afford to care for them; Moldova is the poorest country in Europe.  They would like to join the European Union, but cannot do so until they have shut down their orphanages.  At the age of 16, the orphans must leave the state orphanages, but they cannot legally work until they are 18.  This leaves them with nowhere to go and nothing.  Statistics show that 1 in 4 of these teen orphan girls are pressed into a life of human trafficking, often in muslim countries.   The Hannah House will begin taking in these girls, a few at a time.  Kristy, myself and Joann (from North Carolina) will live there as the House Mothers.  The orphan foundation that the missionaries founded will provide them with higher education, food, a home and other needs.  We will teach them what family and love is, how to cook and sew, how to be ladies, and most importantly... about Jesus Christ.  He truly is their only hope.


Yep!

You just NEVER know where God will take your little (or big, in my case) feet when you're willing to move them. We covet your prayers. Pray that the house sells. And for me, I ask that you pray for God to help me efficiently use my time. I've been a little overwhelmed lately, working on some big projects for the Hannah House and the missionaries, work, getting the house ready to sell (Kristy has done most of that, but I DO have to make my bed every day), life, trying to sort through 27 years worth of "stuff." Ugg, I wish I wasn't so emotionally attached to rediculous stuff.   Case in point: I found my wisdom teeth today.

God is so very good. I will tell you more later, but please do pray for us. :-) And pray for our family, as we spread our wings halfway across the world.  This is probably about the most unselfish and loving gesture a parent can display, to let their children go so far out of reach.
We will be 9 hours ahead of you all.

It's excitin'!

BE {in love} .... wedding

Shooting weddings... I have a love/hate struggle inside me everytime I'm asked. I never intended to taking wedding photos. Its intimidating. Scary. This is one of the biggest days of your life, and you want ME to capture it?!

You must not know that I am so absentminded that I lock my keys in my car often, get so deep in thought that I walk into walls, set my purse on a hot stove, wash my hair 3 times because I can't remember if I did it once....

You must not know that I feel sick to my stomach every wedding morning, that I wait for 4-5 days to even go through your pictures because I dread opening them up to find that I blurred your moments, blew out your special glances.

You must know that in the end, I cry. I LOVE this. After all of that, I love it. I love hanging out in the background, getting a special glance into the heart of every deeply special moment. I love thinking about God's almighty plan, and how he brings 2 people together.

Tebow

Tim Tebow was a missionary kid.  His parents were missionaries in the Philippines when he was born.  They were advised to abort him.  Watch this interview with his parents. 

Wow, what hath God wrought with a father's prayer.
http://youtu.be/hgKfIlj3sD0

Project M: Focus

My palms began to sweat as additional lanes were added.  First 3.  Now 4.  5, then 6.  What am I thinking?!   Its  okay, Anna.  It is.  Just breathe.  Watch for your exit and continue to breathe.  Its not that difficult.  But  its dark, and there are cars... hundreds of cars, all around.  Headlights ahead, beside, in the mirror, above and below.  I don't know the way.  Just focus Anna.  Focus, and remember that the exits are in numerical sequence.  When you get close, pop into the right-most  lane and hold your ground.

Breathe, and laugh.  "Lord... I need your help.  If you think I am EVER going to drive in Moldova, I need you tonight.  I need to know that I can do this."

Seconds later, I glanced ahead, then quickly in the rear-view mirror.  I looked beside me.  This cannot be real, can it?  For a small space of time, about 45 seconds, I had a very large bubble all around me.  No cars.  Almost as if there were a magnetic forcefield around me, repelling anything that would come near.  Again, I laughed.  Only my God.

I was on my way to Salt Lake for a photography class.  This was large in many ways.  I like to think I'm ALIVE.  BRAVE.  ADVENTUROUS.  But... I forget sometimes.  When I sit still too long in life, my confidence slips.  I forget that I love to push myself beyond my comfort zone.  I always remember the dread, but how easily I forget the rush, the excitement.  The belonging.  The perfect fit.

I found my hotel that I had reserved online.  I checked in.  I walked leisurely to a restaurant.  I felt like such an adult.  When did this happen?  I felt like giving in to the nerves of tomorrow.  Worrying, overstudying my camera manual, overstudying my map to the University.  But no.  I stopped.  I savoured the evening.  I enjoyed being an adult, I soaked it up.  I didn't even turn on the TV.  I don't even remember what I did for sure, I think mostly just laid there thinking about life and its direction.

The next day, I checked out and left super early.  No way was I going to be late for this class.  By this time, I was beginning to enjoy my role as navigator / map reader / SuperWoman.  I used my little Google picture to find my way to the University building I needed.  I walked in, dressed to the nines.  This always helps.  I don't know what it is about heels, but they help.  Sometimes I don't wear them, on purpose, because I am VERY aware of the confidence they give me.  Its serious business Anna.  I could tame a lion when wearing heels.  You see, this class was scary for me.  I would never in a million years have signed myself up for something like this, let alone in a "big city" that I would have to drive in by myself.  I have a Jekyl/Hyde kinda thing going on most of the time.  There's the reserved Anna that doesn't think she's capable, and then there's the scary strong Anna that could take over an entire military armed with a plate of chocolate chip cookies.

Ohhhh the moment I heard my powerful German boots clicking down the halls of knowledge... I knew I was right where I belonged.  Uneasiness slipped away, replaced by a confident grin.  Camera bag shouldered, Groupon print-out in hand, I registered and slipped into the conference room to find a seat in the 4th row.  I was early and the room was fairly empty.  I spoke to my seat mate, who probably felt I sat too close to her.  I do this sometimes.  I began to visit with her.  She began to shut me down.  No worries, I'll find the friendlies.  I noticed a beautiful young woman of Indian descent shyly turning around from Row 2 ahead of me.  She heard my friendly tone and was cautiously locating the face to match.  Our eyes connected and we became instant friends.  Some between us were annoyed as we exchanged initial pleasantries, but it didn't matter.  As the room filled to capacity, a young almost late-comer hurried in, head hung bashfully low, sheepish smile on her face as she scanned the room for a seat.  She started to look worried as she circled the room.  I picked up my camera bag, opening the seat beside me, and offered her a seat.  She flashed me a grateful smile with the most sweet dimple.  Those girls were my comrades all day.  It was as if the three of us had grown up next door neighbors, sharing Barbies and having tea parties.

Supryiah is from India.  She came to America for an arranged marriage.  It was so fascinating to hear her talk about it.  She said in her culture, it is not as it has always been.  There are more and more "love-marriages" (her term) than ever before.  The arranged marriages are quite common still, but they are not forced.  She said "of course I can choose... I can choose NOT to accept the man the select for me."  But she accepted him.  And she blushed with happiness as she explained to Christine and I that, for her and her husband, it is a wonderful thing.  For them, EVERYTHING is all new, every big and little thing they do together, it is new.  She has been married one year, and she is still a blushing, glowing bride.  Christine said she wished she could  have an arranged marriage because dating has left her nothing but heartache.

Anyways.  I could go on and on about this weekend trip.  It was so good on so many levels.  I needed to remember that lion-tamer Anna.  Its time for her to come back around.  I'm gonna need her as life changes here shortly.  Its good to know she's still around.  And its so good to know that my God is going to take care of me, by land, by sea, by car, by carriage, on foot, in the air.... He's got me covered.

Supriyah.... a study on focus.

*Project M disclaimer: All Project M photos are shot on Manual mode, and will be displayed as straight out of the camera (SOOC) aside from the watermark.

Documentary: Moldova

Made for Moldova from Anna Marxer on Vimeo.
A glimpse at the mission field of Moldova, including exclusive interviews with some of the orphans that have been helped by this ministry.

This is a documentary of sorts, although that wasn't the intention when we started this project. We merely just wanted to capture the heartbeat of a place where God is doing great and wondrous things.

p.s. Dana, I'm mailing you a copy.

Sweet deal on Adobe Lightroom

This sale ends today, Saturday.  Newegg is a company that I buy from occasionally.  I trust them fully and so do some of my old newspaper colleagues.

Adobe Lightroom is an awesome program for photographers.  I've only played with a demo a little bit, but its a great tool loaded with helpful organizing and editing features... especially for batches of photos.

$99, today only.  I read the fine print, and this appears to be a fully legal retail version, upgradeable.

OFFER EXPIRES today!

taxes and stuff

1. Today I finished my tax return for 2011.  Oofta.  This is the first year I've had "business" income to report, and so I filed my first Schedule C.  I ended up owing the Feds money.  Bummer.  BUT!  The bright side is that my good ol' Montana pulled through with a small ray of hope in the form of $200.  I could buy an accounting program with that to make next year's taxes simpler.  Or, like, 30 pairs of cute tights.  Or, start a nest egg towards buying another camera body to take to the Moldova orphans.  Or 200 dark chocolate bars with sea salt (bliss in a bar, I kid you not).  1 TB external drive for when I switch solely to laptops (within the next month).  ** Let me know if you want to buy an awesome desktop computer, flatscreen, photoprinter setup.  I'll provide more details soon.  I need to become portable.** 
2. Eu vorbesc româneşte putin, nu foarte bine.  But it will improve. It must!
3. 3 weddings coming up.  2 for sure.  Emily and Bill in two weeks.  A brand new client in June.  AND.... excitement of excitements!!!!  I think I'll be shooting a wedding in Germany in October.  If I can work out payment and travel expenses.
4. Life is going to change in a big, exciting, scary way soon.  I'll let you know in a few weeks.
5. Next weekend I'm attending a photography class in Salt Lake, purchased for me by a very dear friend.
6. I love God and what He has done for me.  I love that I am saved, and KNOW I will go to heaven when I die.  I love that it has nothing to do with me, but everything to do with my faith in Jesus Christ.  I love how He shows me His love in a million personal ways, undiscernable by others.
7. Have I mentioned Dark Chocolate bars with sea salt?
8. Documentary: Moldova Missions, coming soon.  This is my first attempt at any such project, and parts of it are difficult to understand / hear.  When we were in Moldova, we had no idea we were making a documentary.  We were just very hungry to learn about these people. This video is the result.  I will provide a link or something soon.

photo I love

I forgot to ever share this with my blog buddies.
This photograph is one of my favorites.  Its one of those that makes me relax and think
it might really be okay to charge for taking pictures.


{Leah}  More photos linked here.

what if...

Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops?
What if your healing comes through tears?
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near?

What if my greatest disappointments, or the aching of this life;
Is a revealing of greater thirst that a world can't satisfy?

And what if trials of this life, the rain, the storms, the hardest nights;
Are Your mercies in disguise?


This song was shared with me by a Moldova orphan.  They understand it on a level I may never reach.  However, it grips me.  It puts beautifully into words how I feel about some of the trials the Lord has allowed us to go through in the last few years.  There's miracles that He made.  Some of those miracles are close to me every day, and I must hold back my emotions or I'd freak them out.  I call it the Leaky Faucet.  Those tears that just seep down the corners of your eyes; quiet, slow, undisturbed.  To wipe them away would draw more attention than the tears themselves.

These are tears that speak the happiness my heart cannot find words for.

Nothing is so sweet in my life as those things that are God's miracles.  God has, on a few occasions lately, taken hopeless situations, dead things, and brought them to life.  Glorious, BEAUTIFUL life.  Far surpassing the life that existed in them prior to the brokenness, the death.

I can't seem to express quite what I mean.  I guess you would've had to be there all along to understand.

Project {M}: happy toes

Tonight I experimented more with Manual.
Please notice the extremely cute nail polish job.  :-)
I found the idea on Pinterest, naturally.

Below is a photo, illustrating my findings.  I played with my settings until I finally got an acceptable photo of my toes.  (This project currently has two rules, no post-shoot editing and no flash)
Then, I switched my camera to my favorite mode, AV (Aperture Priority) to duplicate the shot and see what my camera would use for settings.

I left the aperture the same, Focal length 18mm, Aperture 3.5.
What the camera did was drastically reduce the exposure time and drastically bump up the ISO.
Kind of an interesting experiment.  **Click the photo to view larger.

Photo Homework: Project M

I need to learn my camera.
This week, I did a scary thing.
I turned the dial to the unchartered territory of {M}.

Yep, manual mode.  I hope to post a photo at least once a week that was shot in Manual.
There's no retouching allowed, aside from the watermark.

Behold...
PIZZA!

Canon T1i
Shutter Speed: 1/40 sec
ISO: 400
Focal length: 18mm
Aperture Value: f/3.5
No flash.

take time

As I looked in the mirror this morning, the words I couldn't help but speak aloud were this: "I wonder if I will ever NOT look tired again."  I truly feel that way.  Kristy said she's had the same thought.

We both have a lot of irons in the fire right now.  If my face passes through your mind, PLEASE pray that I can manage my time with God's help.  An encouragement He gives me often is the verse that says "This is not your rest."  The other day, we sang "We'll work 'till Jesus Comes."  There's a stanza that goes like this...
Oh, land of rest for thee I sigh
When will the moment come?
When I can lay my armour by
And dwell in peace at home?

I am not complaining, truly I'm not.  I am blessed beyond belief.  I love being busy.  But I am having trouble discerning what the priorities are right now... WHAT do I focus on first?  It all seems important.

Today, I found a priority.
Lunch Date with SuperMan.

Upon picking up this excited young superhero, he made me laugh.  A laugh that eased the tension of the last 5 months of busy, at the very least.

"Let's go, Bay-bay!"  all saucy-like

thrift stores

I have developed a renewed love for thrift store shopping.  A friend and I recently raided a thriftstore and bought 20 massive men's tshirts to make t-shirt scarves out of.  I May post more about that adventure at some point.
I randomly found this fun website today when I was looking for something about McDonalds.  Like  I said, random.
Anyways... I got sucked in reading her blog.

Dana, we have to go again sometime. :-)

http://wrinkleddollar.blogspot.com/
This is the picture that pulled me in, isn't it pretty?  I'd love to recreate this photograph, maybe with a longer skirt.